Xiblophobe #AtoZChallenge #AprilA2Z ‘X’


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Xiblophobe: to experience fear or great distress when faced with the prospect of the washing machine having eaten even more of your socks.


Yeah. I totally made that up.

But it sounded good, right? I hope it did; it took me a whole fifteen seconds to come up with it. 😉

Weird though… how saying something with authority and/or passion can make people believe it? And all humans do it. It’s how we’re able to lie so effectively.

But me? I’m a writer, so lying is my job.
Making stuff up and making it sound legit is what I get paid for (when I’m writing fiction anyway).

Everybody knows that vampires aren’t real (you do know that right?) but it’s my job throughout the course of Silk Over Razor Blades to make you forget that. I have to make you believe that Ileandra really has been bitten by a ‘creature of the night’ and now has no idea how she’s going to be able to live the rest of her life. That she’s afraid for her sanity in the face of all her dreams.

Don’t look so surprised. Isn’t this what directors and producers do with every film they make?

I watched Iron Man 3 the other day (love that film, had to buy it to rewatch it because I like it so much). First of all… Robert Downey Jr isn’t a rich (well he is, but you know what I mean), owner of a billion dollar technology company. He doesn’t have small pieces of shrapnel slowly sinking into his chest ready to pierce his heart, and he doesn’t, therefore, have a blue, glowing, electro-magnetic thingy plugged into his chest. More than that, he most certainly doesn’t have dozens upon dozens of big metal suits in which he can fly, fight crime and take more physical punishment than anyone was ever meant to outside a boxing ring.

But you believe it.

For those two hours you sit and watching the film you believe all those things. His name is Tony Stark. He really does have metal in his chest threatening to kill him every minute of every day. He does have all those cool suits and he’s able to use them to fight bio-chemical terrorists and aliens (The Avengers, if you’re curious).

Writers (of fiction) have the absolute coolest jobs in the world.

We get paid (hopefully) to make things up, sometimes sensible, often totally outlandish. And we get to make people believe it!

Xiblophobe… yeah. If I lose another one of my purple socks in the washing machine I might just freak out, but that isn’t the word for it.

But… for a tiny, split second, you believed me, didn’t you? 😉
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WIP Excerpt (What I Took Away) #AtoZChallenge #AprilA2Z ‘W’


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I’ve been hacking at Silk Over Razor Blades for so long that I have LOTS of deleted scenes. I could post them all here, but I don’t know if it gives away to much. So I’ve chosen just one.

This scene in which in which Detective Brad Thorne visits Ileandra’s house trying to speak to her about the attack on the park two days before. Unfortunately, when he arrives, he finds that simply stopping in for a chat was not as simple a task as he hoped.

Brad unfastened his tie and threw it on the desk. The end landed in his mug of coffee and rapidly began soaking up the strong smelling fluid. “Damn.” Fishing it out, he left it leaking on a sheet of scrap paper and returned to the file before him.

The woman in the black and white scene photos looked worse than she had on the grass at the park. The hard lighting gave her skin a washed out appearance, compounded by the lack of colour. The wound on her neck stood out in dark, messy relief against the pallor of her neck and shoulders.

He thought again about the family; two kids, the oldest a mere five years old. Now orphans. The father tried valiantly to hold it together, but in the end, he cried. A WPC had to lead him away while he sobbed onto her shoulder.

“Pauline Lock,” he murmured, scrawling the dead woman’s name across the top of the page. It felt worse, somehow, having a name. The futility and sadness of it seemed far more real.

Grinding his fingers into his eyes, he stood and wandered over to the water cooler. He poured a cup and downed it in one swallow. He did the same with the next.

His head ached; terrible pounding as though somebody was riffling through his thoughts with a hand whisk.

“I should have stayed off.” He returned to his desk and searched for some pain killers. After a brief moment of triumph he realised that the blister pack he held was empty.

The rest were in his car.

Brad considered leaving them, but the pain was slowly becoming too much to bear. Still grumbling, cursing and flexing his fists he stomped out to the staff car park.

In his car he dug through the debris filling his glove compartment. There; a full pack of ibuprofen. And some cigarettes. “Guess I don’t need to worry about the smell on my clothes any more.” After a sneaky glance over his shoulder he lit one and leaned back to enjoy the taste and smell.

He fiddled with the radio, flicking the switch to allow the crackle of various outdoor units to fill the space.

“Base,” crackled a voice,” requesting nearby PCs in the vicinity of 1212 Mason Drive, Oadby. Resident reports domestic disturbance.”

Brad dropped the cigarette. Cursing, he scrabbled around on the foot mat, simultaneously reaching for the handset. “Repeat address please?”

“Who is this?”

He found the cigarette and popped the door open to flick it through the window.

“DI Brad Thorne, LI142. Just give me the address.”

The voice repeated it. Brad felt sick.

“I’ve got that, Base.”

A snort came through the speakers. “Don’t you have more important things to do?”

“I said I’ve got that. I know the address; it’s linked to a case of mine.”

“Fine. Do you want backup?”

He thought about it while strapping himself in. “Get me Tristen.”

“Who?”

“Tristen Blake. New guy.”

“Number?”

He strained his memory. “DF935 or something like that.”

“Fine.” The radio crackled again and died.

At the house Brad saw the car and motorbike still in place.

Peering through the window was a small pigeon of a woman with grey hair and skin like a shar-pei. She tugged her thin dressing gown tight around her and flip-flopped over to him as he stepped out of the car.

“Did you call about a disturbance?” He asked.

“Yes. I’m Abigail Ferdinand… Mrs Abigail Ferdinand. I live next door.”

“Hi. I’m Detective Inspector Brad Thorne. What’s the problem?”

“I heard shouting.” The woman blinked at him through glasses that magnified her beady eyes to monstrous proportions. “First Nick – that’s the young man who lives here – came out and put some things in the bin. When he went back it all began. Screaming, Detective. And banging. I’ve been knocking for some time but nobody’s answering.”

“Do you know if the woman is there too? Ille— Il—”

“Ileandra? No, I haven’t seen her. I think she went out. I don’t know. But Nick was defiantly there. And he was talking to someone. These are good houses but the walls are so thin.” She stroked one hand down the brick work. “So thin. Sometimes I hear their television when it’s up too high. But they’re always good about turning it down. Polite young couple. Very nice. Getting married, you know?”

“Really?” With half an ear on the conversation, Brad slipped around the woman and peered through the window.

The curtain, obscured much, but he could see traces of the furniture and partially through to the kitchen.

“There’s a body on the floor, Detective.”

“Excuse me?” He turned back to the woman.

“Yes, if you look; just by the sofa. Some legs. At first I thought it might be some dirty washing, but Ileandra is so much tidier than that. But then I saw they were definitely legs. And they’ve not moved since I’ve been out here.”

Brad took a deep, steadying breath. “And you didn’t think that was important when you rang? Somebody could be hurt.”

A look of horror crossed the woman’s face. “Hurt? You really think so? Oh, I’m sorry Detective, I never considered that. I do hope not. They’re such a lovely couple. Getting married, you know? So kind. So polite.”

Sure enough, as he stared through the window, he could just make out the shape of a pair of legs on the floor behind the sofa. A discarded shoe, something green and silky, and a sock spotted with blood. “Damn.” He knocked on the window. Then hammered it, turning his ear to listen out for anybody inside.

“I told you, Detective, I’ve been knocking for a while.”

“Okay, Mrs Ferdinand, is it? Step back, please. Now.” Sweeping her aside with one arm, Brad moved up to the front door. “I said get back.”

“Of course, but do you need any help?”

“I’m fine.” He tried the handle. Locked of course. “Just keep back.” Steeling himself, spreading his feet on the floor, Brad leaned into his back heel and kicked at the handle.

The door shuddered but didn’t move.

He kicked it again, grunting as the jarring impact shuddered up his leg and rattled his ribs.

Mrs Ferdinand tsked and trotted off around the side of the house, angling her body towards the open door which marked her own home. Brad ignored her and kicked the door again.

The wood whined, but held fast.

Huffing and puffing, he hurried back to the car and the radio. “Base, this is Detective Brad Thorne responding to a domestic disturbance?”

A burst of static erupted from the speaker. “Yes, go ahead.”

“At the site now. Quiet but some evidence of an injured party within the house. Request backup and medical assistance.”

“Copy. Sending a unit your way.”

“Medical?”

“What status is the injured?”

“No idea. I can’t get in the house. Just send an ambulance ready for anything.”

“Copy. Base out.”

Brad tossed the radio back onto the seat and returned his attentions to the door. Balling his fists, gritting his teeth, he drove his foot against it.

It wobbled once but refused to budge. Even after three more solid kicks it remained firm.

He wiped a film of sweat off his forehead. “Bloody hell. Okay… back door.” Turning, he stepped straight into Mrs Ferdinand who stared up at him with her huge, blinking eyes.

“Are you okay, Detective?”

“Is there a back door here?”

“Yes, it’s just around the alley there. But Detective,” she grabbed his arm as he moved to go and held on with a grip like claws, “why don’t you use the key instead?” With the other hand she held up a single Yale key.

A twitch started to tug at Brad’s left eye. “Where did you get that?”

“Oh, Ileandra gave it to me months ago. Emergencies, you know?”

He fought the urge to scream. “And this isn’t an emergency? Why didn’t you use it sooner?”

“I don’t like to pry, Detective.” Mrs Ferdinand drew herself up to her full height of five feet. “It’s not my business. But if you really need to get in I’m sure she won’t mind.”

“Please do.” He said.

Nodding, she shuffled over the drive, knotting one hand in the front of her dressing gown to keep it closed while the other wobbled towards the keyhole. After three snail-paced tries she fitted the key into the lock and turned it.

“Thank you.” Brad barged past her without waiting, straight through the hallway and into the living room.

The first thing to hit him was the smell.

Not so bad as some he had experienced, but certainly not pleasant. Like unwashed public toilets. He held his hands to his nose and stopped in the doorway, scanning the floor for a safe way forward.

From his position the legs were clearly visible, beside them a single sock with a bloodied sole.

He frowned, picking his way across the carpet in as straight a line as he could manage, rounding the sofa on the left side.

When he saw what lay there, he felt his heart speed up in his chest. “Shit.”

As much as I like the chapter, in the end, it just didn’t have a place. So it can go here instead! Hope you enjoy it.
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Vampires Can Do What? #AtoZChallenge #AprilA2Z ‘V’


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I’ve talked about vampires before. In fact, I talk about them a lot (post1 post2 post3 post4). It’s because I love them so much.

I love how a creature that doesn’t even exist can cause so much fear and discussion and enjoyment. I love the darkness. I love the fact that you can swap and change them to suit what you want and how those changes can be awesome (Daybreakers) or cause folk to gnash their teeth and swear vengence on you (Twilight).
nice red vampire lips with blood and teeth, from OpenClipArt
My vampires, hopefully, do all of those things.

When I wrote Silk Over Razor Blades the first time, I was very young. Buffy was still at the forefront of my mind and my vampires had a very obvious Josh Whedon flavour. Now, years on, with Christopher Pike, Anne Rice, Laurell K Hamilton, Charlaine Harris, Stephen King, Shuan Hutson and various other authors behind me, I hope I’ve put a new spin on things. Comparatively recent reads from the likes of Johnny B Truant, Felicity Hunt and even writings from my critique group have all added spice to the old myths and given rise to something new. I hope.

One: My Vampires Walk By Day.
I know this flies in the face of one of the biggest ‘rules’ regarding vampires, but writing a story set wholly at night just wasn’t something I fancied. And it didn’t make sense because…

Two: My Vampires Are Rooted In Ancient Egypt
This isn’t new, but the period of history I chose to use is. At least as far as I know. Ptolemaic Egypt, but right at the end before the Romans came along and battered everything. So this is in the last days of Cleopatra VII, last pharoah of Egypt.

Three: My Vampires Have Abilities Based Not On Age But Generation
Again, this isn’t new, I’m sure the White Wolf RPG Vampire Masquerade does something similar, but quite specifically, my vampires take their abilities based on how many steps removed they are from the first vampire. And there are only five possible powers to choose from; those closest to the first get more than those further removed. One of those five powers has several facets, but, for the most part, it’s a simple ‘you have it, or you don’t.’ *shrugs* It just seemed to make sense to me.

Four: My Vampires Are Religious
The last set of religious vampires I came across were those in the Blue Bloods series by Melissa de la Cruz. I’ve only read the first of that series, but I really enjoyed the idea that vampires were fallen angels. Mine aren’t quite like that, but they do have an odd relationship with their Gods (yes, Gods, remember they’re Egyptian) and often have to stop and think about the ramifications of what they do before they act.

Five: My Vampires Aren’t Mindless or Evil For The Sake Of It
Bar a few, because every race has variety and diversity, most of the vampires you’ll come across in this trilogy are quite ‘normal.’ They drink blood, yes, but they aren’t palm-rubbing evil doers out to take over the world. Most of them anyway. The majority just want to get on with the lives they created as humans and it just so happens that they need to drink blood to survive. If you think about it… sucks to be them, right?

Six: My Vampires Are NOT Dead
There are strong feelings about this one. Vampires are dead, no breath, no pulse, no reflection, yadda, yadda. But in a book where they aren’t known to the public, do you really think they would get away with that? All the glass and metal and mirrored surfaces in the world; that at least would show them up.
No, my vampires aren’t dead. They live, they breath, they have a heart beat. They don’t eat because the ‘magic’ for want of a better word, that powers their bodies won’t allow them to do so. The blood is far less about sustainance for the vampire than it is about sacrifice to the power that made them. Blood, no matter what you believe, is a powerful substance. It gives life, the loss of it takes life. That, in of itself, is a great idea to play with.

I think that’s as much as I can tell you without giving away all my secrets (!!!) but I’d love to hear from you vampire fans out there. What are the strangest traits you’ve ever read attributed to a vampire? What annoyed you the most? Do any of my (vague) teasers sound like something that would send you running for the hills or have you salivating at my door for more?
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Usually Unusual #AtoZChallenge #AprilA2Z ‘U’


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I used to take great pleasure in being ‘unusual.’ It took a while, but eventually, during my school years, I shied right away from being popular and well liked. I was pleased to be part of the ‘weird’ crowd.

Not much has changed, if I’m honest. From what I like (looking at me, you wouldn’t expect me to tell you that I play RPGs and that I LARP as often as I can), to what I believe (my family is quite Christian, I don’t seem to match), to what I do (write erotica). Weird. Apparently.

But what is weird, really? What is unusual? Is it such a bad thing?

Magic wandI don’t think so. I mean… it’s weird and unusual ideas that are popular with the public. Harry Potter… come on – a boy wizard? That’s unusual. With post sent by owl and sports played on broomsticks. All unusual when compared to the world we live in. But those books (which I love, by the way), have done spectacularly well. Merchandising, films, translations into dozens of other languages. JK Rowling must be laughing at how an ‘unusual’ idea has so changed her life.

50 Shades of Grey. Unusual; at least to those outside the BDSM scene (and to some of those within it, from what I can tell!) and yet that trilogy has done ridiculously well.

I always use these two examples, but that’s mainly because the two sets of books and the two authors are great examples of most of the things I like to talk about.

But are these things really unusual? And is ‘unusual’ as unusual as people say it is? Yes there are fantasy books with crazy worlds, diverse races and strange languages, but are they really that odd? At their core, aren’t they just stories about people? Harry Potter… a very clear example of the fight between good and evil? 50 Shades… a representation of one person’s experience (???) of a new and exciting relationship with a man? That’s all they are. Just because the detail of these stories are different, it doesn’t make them unusual.

When I talk about myself and what I do I often use the following words:
Strange
Different
Unusual
Weird
Bizarre

But I’m beginning to think that this is the absolute height of arrogance. Because I’m not. Not really. At my core, I’m just like everyone else; a person with loves and dreams and goals and ambitions. Just like all of you.
Ah well. Better work on a different USP, eh? 😉

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Team Work! #AtoZChallenge #AprilA2Z ‘T’


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I know that Ileandra and I are separate. We write different things and find freedom in being able to go our own way, each without worrying about the other. But… we are still one person. The Shared Brain still holds us both and she is the one behind the keyboard tapping the keys.the shared brainSo it shouldn’t be too strange – should it? – to consider a collaborative project between me and Ileandra? Some kind of erotic fantasy in which the pair of us got to stretch our creative muscles and produce something together that we could both put our names on. It would have to have vampires in it (at least) to satisfy Ileandra, and it would have to have plenty of interesting sex in it to keep me amused, but there’s absolutely no reason why we couldn’t do that.

I’ve had the idea for some time and I’m throwing it out to you because I trust your judgement. I want to know what you think. It’s crazy enough that we write this way, both of us happily acknowledging that we’re actually the same person. It always seems to capture people’s imagination when The Brain tells people how the blog works. Do you think we could pull it off? Write a story – probably novella length – and publish it through Little Vamp Press as the collaborative efforts of Raven ShadowHawk and Ileandra Young?

Maybe we should start with a smaller project first. Just a short story or two to see if we can garner a bit of interest in doing so. In fact, yes!

This is what we’re going to do:

Ileandra and I are going to write a short story. We’ll get it polished up, beta read, proofread and the like and then we’ll release it to mail list subscribers to test what people think. If she releases it to her list and I release it to mine, we’ll get a good idea of how both sets of readers like the idea. Pending the reaction of that release, we’ll produce more.

Yeah… that’s a plan. ^_^

So, do you want to be involved with something like that? If you do, it’s pretty simple; just join my mailing list (or Ileandra’s) and wait for the news to pop up in the newsletters.

I can tell you now that this won’t happen before the Meeting Each Other series is complete. But, considering that we’re now at the half point it won’t take very long at all.

Ooo. I’m all tingly now.

If you want to tell me what you think of the idea before we get there then feel free to chip in below. If it looks as though it isn’t going to work we may just save our writing efforts for what we do best. 😉

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