Bonus Blog: How To Deal With A Late Night Baby Poop Explosion


~as experienced by me tonight

1) Accept that all your hopes for a decent night of sleep will not be fulfilled.
2) Stop cussing the giggling baby.
3) Stop laughing at the giggling baby. 4) Visit the next room, waking partner on the way, to collect wipes, nappies, a new babygrow and new sleeping bag.
5) Take peripherals into the bathroom.
6) Return to main bedroom to collect poopy baby.
7) Repeat step three.
8) Fill bidet with warm, baby temperature water.
9) Repeat step two.
10) Undress baby; DO NOT step in dirty nappy (ew!).
11) Place baby in bidet. Clean.
12) Repeat steps two and three.
13) Dry baby and dress in new clean clothes.
14) Place hand in dirty nappy. *sigh*
15) Repeat step two.
16) Clean hands, leave dirty clothing in bidet filled with bubble bath… We’ll deal with that in the morning.
17) Take clean, giggling baby back to bedroom and place back in bed.
18) Repeat step two.
19) Write amusing blog post and publish to blog (don’t forget to share with Facebook and Twitter).
20) Return to troubled sleep, feeling grateful that baby’s twin brother is still asleep. For now….

image

Yes, I really did do this.

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Six Sentence Sunday 23/09 #33


Am I morbid? 😦

I keep looking back over some of these stories – the ones written for my A-Z of Flash Fiction – and I can’t help but notice how many of them feature people dying. :-/ Buried in gardens, trapped in vents, drowned or whatever else, very few of these seem to be happy or cheerful. I might have to work on that.

Particularly since I’m in such a good mood! All sorts of good things are happening these days and I want to share them with you through the tone of my writing. Hmm, maybe I should do a little more flash? We’ll see.

This week’s six sentences is brought to you by the letter ‘X.’ A tricky one, but the trigger word, probably goes without saying, ended up being ‘xray.’

In this piece Detective Gino Smith is investigating a bizarre murder. He has gone down to visit the morgue where his colleague Agnes waits with the pathology report.

~Gino hints at the peculiar circumstances of the victim’s murder…

Agnes smirked. “What’s so odd about that? You had me believing this guy was a complete whack job.”

“He says the dog passed her out and then buried her.”

That made the woman pause. She turned to face him, snaking a wisp of hair back behind her ear, untangling another that was caught in the frames of her thin rimmed glasses.

Are you getting it quicker than she is? The dog ‘passed her out.’ Hehee.

Yeah… I am morbid.

Hopefully this week’s selection of authors is not so grim as me. Check them out by using the banner link below. Laterz!

Six Sentence Sunday

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Baby Update!


Its been a while, hasn’t it?

In keeping with the wishes you guys expressed in this post, both in the comments and on Facebook, I suppose its time to give you an update.

How are we doing?

Well since its September, Dave has to be thinking about going back into work properly. I’ve been very lucky so far in that I’ve had him all to myself for most of the summer and lots of help in the form of family and friends. Now however I’m testing the waters to see how well I an handle a day on my own. Frankly put, its still too bloody hard, but I know now, that if I really am on my onsies for a day, I can handle it. It doesn’t happen all that often though.

The boys are four and a half months now and growing so big! I can hardly reconcile old pictures to what they look like now. All smiling and chubby and full of expression. Michael is so serious and there are so many pictures of him gazing intently into the distance while Leon is the goofy one. He’ll smile or gaze at you (or something) totally cross eyed. I love the way their personalities have leapt forward, and so firmly as well. I can even tell the difference from earlier weeks when they were testing themselves and what they liked. Now they are very clear in when they’re happy or unhappy or even just bored. They have little signals for when they’re tired and such a bizarre sense of humour that I really can’t deny that they’re my kids. Leon particularly really enjoys laughing at my face. Is that just a baby thing, or is my face really that strange to look at?

To date, the lads have attended three BBQs, one Pride parade, three sleepovers and the local Caribbean carnival. They did this in various states of awareness, but they did do it. I’m ever so proud of them.

Leon and Michael

Leon in white, Michael in red. Told you… thoughtful stare into the distance!

Right now, I’ve managed to catch them taking a nap, but I doubt it will last long.

They have decided, as one, that night time is for sleeping in two hour bursts with a two hour wakeful period at about 3am in which they grab their teddy bears by the foot and proceed to gnaw on them, very loudly, while mummy covers her head with a pillow. Something else that seems to make them both laugh!

Coming up in their lives is Halloween, Christmas, their naming day celebrations and possibly another residential trip as they come with me to Conception. By then they may be either teething, crawling/walking or both. Lord help us!

Still, I wouldn’t trade up for anything. I love how I feel when I’m with them and when they look at me. Each morning, when I’ve finally accepted that I’m not getting any more sleep, the little smiles I get on putting my head over the cot are totally worth it. They’re so beautiful!

/swooning mummy love. ^_^

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Loverly!


Now… I know, strictly speaking, that the award is ‘One Lovely Blog,’ but as soon as I read the nomination, I thought; ‘how loverly.’ I kid you not.

Right, now that’s out of my system, let’s get on with it.

Kate over at 4amWriter was kind enough to nominate me for the One Lovely Blog award almost a month ago! Not only that, but she made her own acceptances rhyme! I’m nowhere near as good as that – nor do I have the time to organise that – but you should check out the post. Its a cool little string of rhymes. 🙂

Now, I promised last time that I would follow the rules a bit more with this, so I need to tell you (more) seven things about myself. o.O

  1. I don’t like brussel sprouts. Those things were sent to test me!
  2. I was almost eleven years old before I decided I liked pizza; previous to that I’d refused to try it!
  3. I’ve used my keyboard soooo hard over the years that all the letters have worn off. I’ve refused to change it because 1) I don’t need the letters – I touch type – and 2) no other keyboard is quite as comfortable as this one.
  4. When I cook, I never measure anything. Ever. All flavouring, seasoning and the like is done by eye and luck. I’ve not poisoned anybody yet, so I can’t be doing badly!
  5. Last week I made yoghurt with my own breast milk (Juls, that’s totally your fault!). It wasn’t actually all that nice. 😦 I’ll have to try again with another batch because I think I did it wrong.
  6. I have never once shaved my legs – not that you’d ever know. 🙂
  7. I used to hate children. Yes… I’ll admit it; I just never got on with them. Boy, how fast some things can change!

Hehee, I wonder how much of that would qualify me for an other TMI Award? :p

Okay, with that much done I want to nominate five other blogs for this award. My last list was rather extensive, so I think, this time, I’ll draw your attention towards five blogs that I’ve followed only recently. They drew my attention for one reason or another and I think you may enjoy them too. Plus they deserve the award!
The Om Blog
Adventures For The Faint Of Heart (not updated as regularly as some, but an amusing read nonetheless)
Writing Between The Lines (okay, not a recent follow, but Naomi always has such lovely stories!)
Craig Hallam
Joy In The Moments

Woo, all done.

Catch you next time!

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Six Sentence Sunday 16/09 #32


I started thinking forward today. Putting my mind ahead to all the things I’m going to be able to enjoy when my kids are older. When lying on their stomachs they can now lift their heads right up and keep them there. And, this morning, Sprog1 said something that sounded suspiciously like ‘Daddy.’ I’m sure its too soon for that, but it doesn’t stop the mad swell of excitement threatening to burst my chest open every time I think about it.

So these six sentences, brought to you by the letter ‘ W’ is ideal. Clearly I was having similar thoughts when I wrote this piece of flash, trigger word ‘wet,’ so its quite apt that it is today’s piece of writing.

Its another of those little scribblings that focuses on real life. The life I have with my two boys and Dave. Its a look forward into what may be in store for us, some way in the distant future.

~The family prepares to leave the house for a short walk together…

“Both Leon and Michael gleefully shoved their water balloons into my hands. Their big brown eyes shone with excitement at the thought of what might come and, despite myself, I found a smile creeping onto my lips. I held my finger up against them as Dave stepped into the hallway and both boys giggled quietly to themselves.

“What?” Dave asked.

The boys continued to snort with poorly suppressed laughter.

I can see it already. I really can! If they aren’t playing tricks on us, they’ll be doing so with each other. Happy, happy, happy days! ^_^

For more fun samples of what the writers of the world have to offer, take a look at the main six sentence website through the banner link below. There’s always a fun selection of stuff to read. 🙂

Six Sentence Sunday

Posted in A-Z Challenge, Flash Fiction, Ileandra's Posts, Other Writings, Sample Sunday | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments