I suppose it would be kind to leave a warning here before you start. Many, if not all, of the links (and pictures) in this series of posts are totally NSFW. If you want to have a look, do, by all means, but don’t be surprised if you find naked boy bits at the other end . . . or girl bits.
Happy? Let’s go.

This is another interesting aspect in which my knowledge is limited. In my reading around and questioning folk, I’ve discovered, as ever, that there are dozens upon dozens of different aspects to humiliation and degradation.

Like other activities under the BDSM umbrella, humiliation is deeply personal, as folk can feel belittled and/or humiliated by a variety of different things. For some, it is name calling or clothing designing to highlight/accentuate physical features a person may not be proud of. For others, the act of taking orders can be hugely humiliating, particularly if they are proud people outside of BDSM. Certain sexual activities can be degrading too; forced oral activities or a specific sexual position may serve to demean, humiliate or degrade a person while they experience pleasure.

There are all sorts of reasons why a person may find this pleasurable and a plethora of blog and articles covering the same discussions again and again and again (and again!). The answers you get depend on a great deal on the sort of site you visit and the people you speak to.

A number of my internet searches turned up sites that discuss SM and the desire for it as a severe mental disorder. However in speaking with people across various blogs and forums, I’ve learned that they don’t see it as such. It is simply another facet of the loving and caring relationship they share with their partner and/or top (remember, not all of these relationships are monogamous and they aren’t necessarily romantic either).

Personally, I believe, for some, there may well be past/childhood traumas worked through by practising SM (or any part of BDSM) but this is not the norm. For some, it really is just their personal kink, but of the beautiful tapestry of likes and dislikes that makes us all different.