A New Project?


hand with pen in a circleSo you know how procrastination is the absolute staple of a writer’s diet? And that we can find all manner of anything and everything to do except finish what we’re trying to do? Well that happened back in November when I started NaNoWriMo and finished it with a very respectable 71,590 words in 30 days. Silk Over Razor Blades went on the back burner while I sorted out (and I’m still sorting, by the way) the wonder that is Clash Of The Animal Kings. So… I’m good at procrastination; I’ve found a sure fire way to avoid ever getting to the end of SORB. -______- Well now it seems I’ve also found a way to avoid finishing Clash as well.

By the lovely people who brought you NaNoWriMo, there is now Script Frenzy. Another fabulous initiative brought to you by The Office Of Letters And Light in which the challenge is to write a 100 page script in 30 days. Good grief. I keep getting the emails about it after successfully completing the NaNo and part of me wants to dive the hell in and give it my all. The other part of me knows full well that I have more than enough projects on the go to avoid adding anything else to that list.

Its crazed, but part of me wants to give up my April to do this. I don’t think it will be quite as nuts as the NaNo was, simply because prose is that much harder to write and I have done script work before. I find it relatively simply once I’ve got a good flow going; must more so than prose. Still, it is a month that I would have to give to Script Frenzy rather than completing two incredibly important projects.

On a similar note, when I paused SORB for the sake of Clash I had a ream of notes in mind from my last read through in which I found points that I wanted to smooth out and round off. Last week, when going through my emails, I found an email from Martin. This man, I don’t believe I’ve mentioned before, but he is the chap, along with his wife, who read through SORB for me a couple of years ago and gave me some very clear, concise and worthwhile feedback. Obviously writing is personal and subjective, so there are aspects of what they said I didn’t agree with and others that I wholeheartedly did, but the return email I got from that piece of work was the basis of a rather significant overhaul for the novel. In May 2010 I sent it to him again with my edits in place for a second round as it were. However, busy lives for all concerned has made it impossible for him to give it much attention. Until last week. His email, when he asked if there was an up to date copy of the novel reminded me of just what I have at stake, what’s on hold and why I was in such a state back in October.

Remember when I talked about not being ready? Well this is part of that. So getting that email from Martin and realising that I’ve paid no attention to SORB since about October made me cringe. And I’ve been reading through Gaea in my spare time which is just reminding me of all these other things I need to be doing. What I’ve done is send him the file so he can take a look at the current edit; as in after I did a lot of work from his initial comments. Every year, however, I grow and mature as a writer, so its going to be interesting to get it back from him, with his comments and then realise that there were a few bits and bobs that I was going to change anyway. And see how well they tally up with his comments.

Anyway, maybe ‘panic’ isn’t quite the right word, but suddenly, with that in my mind, rattling around Script Frenzy and Clash I suddenly feel like I’ve got a whole lot to do and very little time to do it in. hourglass image in black and whiteI have a clear and definite deadline for Clash. June 30 2011 is when my voucher runs out and I want to give myself space and time to be sure its perfect so I want it done by my birthday. That’s the start of May. I have LARPs coming up and parties and weddings and all manner of other gatherings that are going to take me away from writing, so I’ve got to push hard. If Clash isn’t done by then, I’ve missed my window. Which would be tragic, in my opinion. What I need to do is give the novel a good strong push to be sure that I’m on the way to finishing my editing. Its March now, in truth that doesn’t leave me very much time.

Wow, okay, I think I’ve talked myself right into the answer to the question ‘should I do Script Frenzy this year?’ Ha! 😀

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Blog Changes


This blog has gone through several changes now; starting out as a fun and comedic sort of laugh at myself through to more seriously considering how my writing is going to progress. Well now I’ve decided to expand a little, branching out into more of what makes Ileandra Young an artist you want to keep up with.

First of all, I have changed the Categories of this blog to more accurate separate out my posts. If you’re curious about certain aspects of what I’m up to, then use the archive on the side of this page, arranged by category, to find what you need.

Second, I have also changed the links at the bottom of the main home page to the blog to show more sites of interest linked to my name. These include my Twitter, my Deviant art and of one of the two radio shows I am part of on a weekly basis. The links below will open a new window (or tab, depending on your settings) and take you to somewhere else connected to me and what I do.

Also at the bottom of the home page, there is a section dedicated to my interests. At the moment, this features primarily the music of local bands I am interested in, however going forward I plan to populate this section with more information and links.


So, all in all, this blog is now more than an account of my novels and WIPs I have. Instead, the blog covers all aspects of my creative outpourings including references to my drawing and my radio presenting. In time, it may also grow to include the band I have thoughts of joining and the progress of my learning guitar, but this, at the moment, is merely in the pipeline. It is not set in stone.

I am also looking forward to connecting this blog to a domain of my own. I, outside of my creative work, am learning the ins and outs of web design and plan to extend this blog to become part of a site which more information about what I do. This site, again will cover all creative outlets of mine, though it will still have a focus on my writing.

Basically, at this stage, what I am saying to you is; watch this space.

Posted in Ileandra's Posts, Procrastination, Real Life Chatter | 1 Comment

Vampires ARE Still Cool – Books


Right. So… I’ve done films. I even touched briefly on TV shows in my last ROAR-FEST about vampires, but this one is about books. And this one is the point of where that last one began. After all, I’m not writing films, I’m writing books and my interest has always been far in the written word and the novel.

So, if you take a peep at My Other Works, you’ll see other bits that I’ve written, am writing or plan to write. In future, I might actually mark those to detail which ones involve vampires. As it is, in brief, for the purposes of this entry you’ll find that Silk Over Razorblades, Gaea, Mathais, Trya’s Tale and probably quite a few of the short stories (and anything to do with RPGs) will involve vampires. My vampires have a variety of different features and quirks which separate one from the other, so, I would hope, there is no danger of them becoming samey or clichéd, even if I write about them all the damn time. Well… there’s only so much originality you can have in a genre that’s been done to death by now, but when I began writing in the first place, vampires seemed to be much less of a big deal. And faaaaaaaaaaaaaar less popular. The best we had was Buffy.

Anyway… vampires in books.

I’ll start now by saying I’m not going to talk about Twilight. I’ve just come back from dinner and seeing Drive Angry (YEY!) at the cinema, I’m in far too good a mood to take about that piece of tripe. Suffice it to say that Stephanie Myer’s vampires are, to my mind, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, WRONG! *ahem* and let no more be said about it (until I have a bad day and need to lash out at something).

Well what does that leave me with? Well, in the past couple of weeks, like I said before, I’ve been reading a lot of vampire fiction. I love the place in puts me in and the way I feel as I turn those pages, wondering what’s going to happen next. And of course trying to decide who’s side I’m on; the vampire, or the human. The best example of this so far is…


The Southern Vampire Mysteries (by most known as the True Blood series)
These are written by Charlaine Harris and they are epic. Freakin epic! I fussed and pouted and kicked my feet around when I was convinced to watch series one of True Blood before reading these books, but I actually bought them about this time last year. Unfortunately for me, I’d just started my bi-annual reading of The Wheel of Time and it actually took me most of the year to get through those monsters. So it probably wasn’t until about October time that I started reading Harris at all. The TV series was impressive. I really enjoyed Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer’s accent – when it wasn’t making me giggle – was quite delicious. However, going through these books gave me to me the character of Sookie Stackhouse who was immediately interesting and wonderfully normal. Despite being a telepath. The relationship she has with Bill as the first book goes on, also drew me in because it involved one of the aspects I loved the most; the vampire allure and their ability to use that to draw in humans. But I also loved the idea that vampires had ‘come out of the coffin’ and gone public. The entire world knew about them and people had reacted in various ways to the idea that humans aren’t the only intelligent lifeforms in the world any more. There are vampires too. Oh and of course werewolves, meneads, shifters, fairies (I wish she’d spelt it faeries), voodoo priestesses and whatever else.
It normalised vampires in a way that allowed the plot to roll on without it just being about vampires. The books also discussed Sookie’s relationship with her friends, with her boyfriend (who happens to be a vampire) with her job and her boss, with her family… there was something just very real and believable about her as a character.
And she’s not even a vampire!
I think my bias is letting me down! :p
Anyway, the vampires of the series also cannot go out by day, they connect (and often interchange) blood and sex almost instantaneously and without fail. They also do their best to hide a weakness to silver. Crosses don’t phase them and neither does garlic, while their blood is a black market drug. Luuuurvely. The drinking of their blood also forms a bond between the human and the vamp which allows, to some degree, the sharing of emotions and thoughts. It brings the pair closer together and almost acts like a homing beacon for the vampire involved. They’ll always be able to find their human meal again.
These vampires – if I forget about what HBO wants me to see – to my mind are an excellent example of what vampires are. These vampires are bad. Not evil, because that is a relative term, isn’t it? But definitely bad. They don’t have the same values, or control, or thoughts as humans. They don’t have the same lives as humans and certainly not the same sense of humour. It makes them a pleasure to read about.


Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series
These are written by Laurell K. Hamilton and are luuuuuuush! I love reading about these vampires, though straight away I can’t help but notice that the first two books I’ve talked about today don’t actually feature vampires as the central protagonist at all. They both feature strong women who are powerful in their own right. Hmm. Interesting. Anyway, Anita Blake’s world is another were vampires are public and everybody knows about them. She’s another character with her own special power; she’s a necromancer. She’s also a professional hunter who tracks down and executes vampires on court orders. An interesting idea that works well. The vampires almost form a sideline to Anita’s antics.
But the vampires are fantastic. These are more vampires who have stuck right to the traditional and cannot go out by day. They sleep in coffins. For all intents and purposes, when the sun comes up, they ‘die’ and neither breath nor reaction to exterior stimuli.
Jean Claude the first powerful vampire that you come across in this series and he’s old, classic, occasionally slips into French when he’s horny or pissed off and stalks Anita in the same sort of way that Eric stalks Sookie. In fact I find Eric and Jean Claude to be very similar; powerful vampires who aren’t used to being told ‘no’ but a human they happen to be chasing.
In fact, it takes Anita a long time to fall to Jean Claude’s charm, but when she does, by hell does she fall for him.
The blood ties formed through the drinking of blood here is close to an enchantment spell (of course I was going to compare it to DnD) whereby the human can be ‘rolled under’ by a vampire’s eyes and be almost hypnotised. They become almost a slave to the vampire’s will. Its an interesting quirk in the blood which Anita neatly bypasses because she has her own resistance to such things through being a necromancer.
Never mind, eh?

These books both feature women who, though not prudish particularly, are more innocent that others in the way of romantic relationships and love. By the time Harris and Hamilton are done with them, Sookie and Anita are raving sex maniacs. Particularly Anita who seems to control a lot of her power (over the were creatures she looks after as well as the vampires following her) by manipulating the desire for her body and her blood. Friends of mine have said that later books from the Anita Blake series just seem to feel like soft porn but, really… are you complaining? I’m not.


Marked (first book of The House Of Night series)
Earlier this year there was a book fair at work. I picked up a stunningly cheap boxset for £3 containing the first book of three difference fantasy series for young adults. At £1 each I really couldn’t say no and hte fact that Kelly Armstrong was one of the authors just made it better. Unfortunately, its not Kelly Armstrong’s book I’m talking about here – though her book was fab! – its P.C. and Kirsten Cast. This is a mother/daughter duo that I’ve never heard of before who, together, wrote Marked.
This book documents the start of a new life for a teenager by the name of Zoey who is marked at school to become a vampire. As soon as I realised what this meant I found I couldn’t put the damn book down; vampires are ‘marked.’ So far, having reached the end of this first book, I am sure that the vampires of this series are not made or kissed, but chosen. They have strong links to Wiccan and Indian-American culture and worship the goddess of night; Nyx.
What a lovely idea!
When these vampires are chosen, a bright mark appears on their forehead in the shape of a crescent moon outline. As they grow older and learn more about what they are capable of, the moon shape fills in and can be joined by more tattoos of varying shapes and designs that can branch out across the forehead and cheeks.
No spoilers from me, but Zoey’s marking, of course, was a peculiar case. 🙂
I have never, ever, come across vampires written like this before. They are more like witches than any vampires I know though they still do drink blood. They can go out by day, though that is uncomfortable for them and can lead to unconsciousness and eventually death if they aren’t careful. These vampires have a particular affinity and closeness to cats and, best yet, not all of these marked teenagers will become vampires. If their body rejects what Cast (& Cast) refer to as ‘the change’ they will simply die. This isn’t a choice, or something they can avoid, it is a natural physical reaction.
That, also, was new; the idea that medical science has tried to explain this phenomena and not been able to, but the kids in the schools of this town learn about vampires as part of their classes. Though the public knows about the existence of vampires, they are, in most cases, uneasy and unhappy about it and try to find cures or avoid those who are ‘afflicted.’ A bit like curving your path on the street to avoid the homeless guy trying to sell you The Big Issue. You know he’s there, you do see him, but you pretend not to because he makes you uncomfortable.
I loved this book and I’m actually keen to see if I can get a hold of the rest of the series. I think there’s seven of them though, so I’m not going to rush. o.O


The Vampire Twins (Bloodlines, Bloodlust & Bloodchoice)
There is a fourth book, but I haven’t read it. And I don’t plan to. I know these books were published in the mid 90s and I know they’re for young adults (and I don’t mean young adults now, I mean young adults back in the mid 90s who are nothing like the 16, 17, 18, 19 olds of today!), but yikes! These were baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad books. -_-
I got the three I mentioned for something like 89p at a charity shop. In fact, it might not even have been that; I might have got them for free through some book-swap thing. Either way, I think I’m just glad that I didn’t pay for them because I’d want my money back.
The plot was weak and holey (and boring) and the characters utterly flat. The vampires themselves didn’t make much sense and just made me uneasy, not in that nice ‘heeeey, I’m reading a scary book’ kinda way, but more in a ‘wtf…? His hands are glowing?!’ sort of way.
These vampires got about in the daytime by wearing sunblock and dark glasses. They didn’t eat solid foods and they would sleep in a coffin, yes, but with such a forced emphasis on it being ‘weird’ and ‘strange’ and ‘creepy’ that I just lost interest. I only kept reading because I needed a book for work. What I did like, however, was that Janice Harrell was pretty good at reminded me, as a vampire fan, that vampires don’t like fire. When one of her characters managed to get caught in a house fire, she was gone in an instant; like a piece of paper soaked in vodka; woooomph! That, I like a lot and even though Ann Rice touched on it when Lestat got caught in that burning house, it wasn’t quite enough for me.


Blue Bloods (first book of the Blue Bloods series)
This is another book from that £3 set I was talking about and its written by a lady named Melissa de la Cruz. I only just finished reading this book this morning and I can’t decide what I think. These vampires, literally have blue blood and are in fact fallen angels being reincarnated over and over and over trying to get back into heaven and into God’s good graces. They drink blood solely to help them survive on earth.
The religious aspects aside, I think I struggled with this main because I found the book hard going. Schuyler (I think I spelt that right) Van Alen is the primary character who the narrative follows most but Cruz seems to have a habit of diving between POVs which is really distracting. I can’t get into a character’s head or feelings when she does it and, to coin a phrase from Writer’s Club, it really does pull me out of the story. Worst of all, however, were the brand names she dropped all over the place. I know the idea behind these vampires is that they’re all rich and well to do and well known yadda yadda blah, but having every other sentence filled with the names of designers and brands that I’ve never heard of just makes my brain hurt. Its all empty-headed fluff about clothes and shoes and handbags, which immediately makes the fact that these characters are vampires, secondary and far less cool.
And, in the most typical and clichéd sense of it all, the meanest vampire is the sexiest, richest and best looking (Mimi Force) while Schuyler herself is dowdy, less rich and has ‘poor’ fashion sense until she slaps on a little make up and realises that she’s ‘a stunning beauty.’ Its been done befoooooooooooooooooore!
Hmm. Yeeeeeeeah.


The Last Vampire Series
This is the series that made me love vampires. THIS IS THE ONE. I wish I could remember them more clearly, but it was probably something like 1998 the last time I read these and I haven’t been able to find these since.
Written by Christopher Pike (who is actually called Kevin Christopher McFadden), these six books feature the tale of Alisa Perne, a blonde haired, blue eyed teenager who is, in fact a 5,000 year old vampire named Sita. She was born in India (dunno how she ended up blonde o.O) in something like 3000BC and lived through things like the life of Krishna and the birth of Christ. She was sworn never to make another of her kind but finds her life thrown into upheaval when a private detective seeks her out and begins to ask questions. Turns how he’s been hired – through many channels – by a name named Yaksha who is in fact the very first vampire back from Sita’s home village who is trying to find her to kill her. And himself too.
I won’t say too much more than that in case you want to read these books, but they are amazing!
I think this was the first time I came across vampires who could walk by day with a reasonable explanation; why shouldn’t they be able to?! They aren’t allergic, they are simply weakened by the sun’s light (which is the case with Bram Stoker’s Dracula by the way). Sita also was able to eat food just like a human and go without sleeping in a coffin. She can also die if injured badly enough.
Sita and the other vampires of this series are my absolute favourites. Just thinking about it now, so many years on, makes me want to read them again. A part of me is hesitant since I know towards the last two books there are serious religious under currents (the messiah has been born again; a miraculous conception culminating in the reincarnated spirit of both Krishna and Jesus [ugh]), but to simply enjoy the powers of a vampire, these books are it.
I know they’re written for young adults (the same sort of time as Vampire Twins) but Pike did it properly.


Pheeeeeew! Right, I think I might have written enough! I didn’t realise I’d gone on quite as long as that and I haven’t even half covered as much as I wanted to. That will teach me; I’ve got to learn to control myself a bit better, rather than just writing and going nuts. A bit like I’m doing now. o.O

I think my final assessment here is that vampires ARE cool in books, so long as you’re reading the right ones. I’ve also decided that traditional seems to work best in terms of vampire powers, agilities and strengths while the originality has to come from the plot. Its all well and good spinning the world on its head and making vampires into fallen angels (if you really want…?) but without a decent plot line, you’ll just confuse people or bore them. Similarly, if you want to turn vampires into witches who just happen to drink blood, then go for it, so long as your characters are vibrant, lively, colourful and real. Zoey Redbird vs Schuyler Van Alen would get my vote any day. Though I guess Alisa Perne trumps them all! :p

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An Eloquent Rant


Well, I like to think its eloquent. It might not be, though to be honest, I sometimes feel that perhaps I could just give up on the ‘sounding-like-I-know-what-I’m-talking-about and instead go for brutal honesty. Then a part of me realises that brutal honesty may perhaps be less than sensible on a blog through which I intend to publicise myself as a well spoken, intelligent, professional individual. One who intends to slap the world in the face with something wet and clammy, probably a fish, and declare ‘I am here… hear me roar (meow!)!’

That’s enough surrealism, just for now. I am of course talking about life outside the writing world, the world where the name on my birth certificate does not read Ileandra Young and, in fact reads something else entirely. The world where bills make stacks as high as basket ball players while you yourself feel perhaps about as tall as that Mini Me chap from Austin Powers. The same world in which some round-faced, red-cheeked American yokel can tell you ‘don’t play soccer, or you’ll go to hell!’ and be blessed with a few thousand youtube hits (you’ve gotta see it, the guy is mad! – and yes, I realise that this reaction of mine is exactly why this guy has so many hits, but indulge me.)

The world where books like Twilight get raved about daily (I might just puke) while other truly amazing and fascinating reads reads (The Lord Of The Rings, 1984, The Story Of Ma Parker, Gormanghast to name just a few!) can be over looked and forgotten. Ugh. I find myself taking personal affront when I hear – even if I just overhear – people singing the praises of that little runt Christopher Paolini who probably ripped every idea going from his youth to come up with the shambles he called Eragon. -_- *sigh* And then to see a fabulous actor like Jeremy Irons in the film version just makes a small piece of my soul want to curl up and die.

Oooh… we’re passionate and angry today, aren’t we, Illy? o.O Particularly since when I started this entry, I had in mind that my rant was going to be about spam. Oops. I might have to save that for next time. Though its funny how much my mind – and therefore my entries here – can drift depending on my mood. For instance, I haven’t spoken to you about SORB in a long while. Ah well. Like I said after NaNo, until Clash is where I want it to be and ready for the draft copy, SORB is resting in limbo.

Anyway, ranting. Eloquently….

I was actually drifting initially into a rant about how unfair the world can be. Primarily because while I was at work today (a rant I’d better not start lest I end up fired), I heard a terribly sad story of one of the women in the department across from mine having lost her aunt in a car accident across the weekend. It made me feel sick inside, thinking about this drunk driver choosing to drive the wrong direction down a three lane motorway, barrelling on at high speeds and instantly killing an innocent woman who was just going about her life in a safe, orderly and private way. The drunk driver who also caused the irreparable trauma of this woman’s young son, who is was in the front seat beside her, having sit quietly in the passenger seat and hold his mother’s hand while she died. He had to be cut out. This life wrecker of a drunk driver, by the way, gets out of his car at the other end with a couple of scrapes and perhaps a bruise. His only punishment for utterly destroying a life and permanently scarring several others. The things I talked about above are unfair… yes I suppose they are, but this… this is just… well… ‘Ileandra The Writer’ has no words for it.

Wow, way to end on a downer. Sorry folks.

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Vampires ARE Still Cool – Films


Call it research. Call it boredom. Whatever you want to call it – I choose to call it ‘getting to know my genre’ – I’ve been reading a lot of vampire books lately. I’ve picked up with some of my older work (To Be A Teenage Vampire, Mathias, Gaea) and then looked more into what other authors are doing or have already done. I was told once that it is important to know your audience, your contemporaries and your competition. Its very true, though I don’t know if I consider these people my ‘competition’ exactly. Silk Over Razor Blades particularly, feels like a very different book to any of those that I’m going to discuss here. That could be my own blinkered sight, or my bias, but I don’t think so.

Anyways, I’m going to spend a while doing this, so this may even spread across two posts. As it is, I’ve decided to split my mini-rant into deciding whether or not vampires in film are still cool, followed by whether vampires in books are still cool. You’ll like this… I really think you will. 😀

I’ll start with Anne Rice and Interview With A Vampire.
Forget for a second that I was probably something like 16 when I first encountered the likes of Louis and Lestat and I did so in the form of Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise respectively.

Oh and Antonio Banderas. Oh dear god that man is phiiiine!!! With those creepy, long nails and that lovely dark hair. All fake, yes, yes, I know, but he made a bloody good Armand. I soooo wanted him to kiss Louis, they were so close!
Ahem, anyway, yes, Interview, was probably one of the first vampire films I ever saw and then I made a point of reading the book several years later. The book, written in a peculiar sort of first person narrative style made me love Louis all the more. The book’s voice, which of course was his, was so very sad and yet hard because underneath all of his suffering and pain, there was a hard, solid core of vampire who had to kill to survive.
Unfortunately, I can’t remember the book as well as I remember the film, but the traditional aspects of vampires, like blood drinking, aversion to daylight and sleeping in coffins, were all things that I enjoyed. Early on in my ‘life with vampires’ I understood that these were the norms.
I can’t consider Anne Rice and her Vampire Chronicles a competition to the SORB series simply because vampires in 2011 aren’t like that any more.

Blade.
Good freakin’ god! I try not to swear in these entries – and often fail – but Blade just pissed me off something rotten, even when I first saw it at about 17 years old? Something like that. I’ve not read the comics, so let’s get that out of the way right now, I’m talking about the films. Considering the fact that I consider Wesley Snipes to be a total douche, those films were just wrong. So very, very wrong! Vampires are born? The hell?! Vampires are hunted by one of their own?! Yikes! I know Blade (stupid name, by the way) is half vamp, but waaaaaaat? And he only has to deal with the ‘bad’ parts of being a vampire. The blood drinking, the aversion to sunlight. What about the awesome stuff he gets on top of that like rapid healing, speed, increased agility and a funky sword (that last one isn’t really to do with being a vampire, but just stay with me on this, okay.)? All he does is whine about it and do his damnedest to be as human as possible.

I think that’s the part I hate most; even in the real world I’m a great advocate of ‘you are what you are; deal with it!’ Not so much fate, or the ‘Grand Master Plan’ or anything religious or daft like that, but mainly that you can’t change what you are deep inside. Maybe you can change your outward appearance, or what people think of you, but if you really are a total dork who collects stamps and patriotic paraphernalia (look out, here comes the royal wedding!), than that’s what you are. Likewise, if you’re a raving sports nut who adores David Beckham and yet hasn’t got a clue who Thesus or Hippolyta are, then burying your face in an upside down copy of Pride And Prejudice isn’t going to fool anybody (particularly anybody who reads Shakespeare or Jane Austin :p).
So why should this film teach that trying to deny who you are is the right way to go about your business? It would have been less of an issue for me if Blade eventually just came to accept what he was, but from what I could see, he seemed to get worse and worse and more whiny as the film went on. I’m not sure about the other two films – its a trilogy, right? – but I really don’t have it in me to give them a chance. Ho hum.

Dracula
There are lots of version of this bad boy and he’s been around for years (Bram’s Stoker’s novel was published in 1897 I believe?). I think my absolute favourite version has got to be that portrayed by Gary Oldman in Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Now this definitely does smack of a bit of bias, but Gary Oldman is a god (have you seen Fifth Element? Batman? Air Force One?!) and he plays this character beautifully.

I’m also thrilled that the script was almost lifted word for word (well, at least in the beginning) from the book, with the letters than Jon Harker wrote well as those ones that Mina wrote on her typewriter. The less said about the ended and about Keanu Reeves as an actor the better (I’ve never heard an Englishman talk like that!) but Anthony Hopkins was a pleasure to watch (as always) as was Cary Elwes.
However it is all about Gary Oldman and how he manages to switch from wizened old man – with silly hair, hehee! – to tall, striking, smooth-talking seducer. Its just fabulous! And this incarnation of the character Dracula, pulled off something that, previous to this, I’d not seen enough to satisfy me. The seduction. The power hidden in a human’s lust and how a vampire can use that to find a meal.
All teenagers are obsessed with sex – yes, even girls – and again I was quite young when I watched this, but I think that scene where Lucy left her room in the middle of the night, wandering out into the garden in her nightdress was just beautiful. I mean Dracula, at that point, was a beast; a big, hairy, ugly thing and yet she was still drawn to him. She went to him willingly and offered up her throat for him to take… I absolutely loved that about the film. Its just such a delicious thought… vampires can lure you in! FUCK yeeeeeeeah!

So… at this point, I think I’ve decided that vampires in film are still cool. But this, I’m afraid, doesn’t touch on much of the more modern stuff – post 2001 – simply because I’ve not watched a lot of it. I, personally, think I’m slipping, but things like Daybreakers and Blade Trinity (-_-) just don’t seem to do it. I was interested in Daybreakers and, if I get the chance, will watch it in the near future. But it really does seem to be the older stuff that has kept me the most interested.
Oh. That is of course, until I mention the inevitable.

Twilight
I know, I know! Every time I have a rant or a long blowout about vampires, these ones come up, but really… sparkling vampires?! Whoever heard of such bollocks? And the fact that my mother claims that ‘the book explains it all as you read it, and it really does make a lot of sense’ is not going to change my mind. It doesn’t make sense. None at all!

Vampires don’t sparkle. Vampires aren’t angsty teenagers who, according to the film, because they are so young, go out of their way to go to school and be ‘normal’ and yet form those horrible, disgusting, pretensious, snotty cliques, that every geek, dork, nerd and outcast fears worse than sports day. Vampires certainly have their fun playing baseball games in the middle of nowhere just so they can ‘play it properly.’ They may have a problem with werewolves (thanks Underworld 😀 ) but then, who doesn’t?
Then again, its not the vampires that bother me most in these films (or the books). Its Bella. With her annoying innocence and freakishly stalker-like tendencies. She ain’t so innocent. Lordy and her incurable fascination with the mundane; she went to school, she ate some lunch, this hot boy looked at her; oh fuck I’d better run home and hide in my room! GUH!

-_-

Well. Okay. That’s enough about vampire films.
I need to wrap this up by pulling my thoughts together. This isn’t all of the vampire films (or TV shows) I’ve seen, not by a long shot (Vampire In Brooklyn, Dracula Dead And Loving It, Buffy, Nosferatu the Vampyre, Dracula, From Dusk Til Dawn, Blackula, Queen Of The Damned, Van Hellsing etc), but these are the ones that stick in my mind. They stick because they have spoken to me and help shape what the vampires of Silk Over Razor Blades are like.

Not to say that my vampires are the true vampires, but I’ve thought long and hard about what makes sense in the vampire mythos and what doesn’t. About how they can hide themselves from humans (Buffy and most other vampire flicks) or, if the tale spins that way, how they have come to be known and accepted/hunted (Sookie Stackhouse books – True Blood TV Series, Daybreakers). How they live day by day (or night by night), since this is a feature that varies across my novels. Silk Over Razor Blade vampires are very different to Gaea’s vampires who are in turn very different to the vampires of Mathias.

Anyway, the point is, if I compare what I’m doing to screen adaptations of vampires then I’ve got very little to worry about in terms of keeping myself fresh and original. Its in other novels where the real competition begins. o.O I’ll cover that next time.

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